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Tuesday, March 6, 2012

Not what I had planned

I feel like the phrase "not what I had planned" can pretty sum up my entire life right now.

Having a kid who still doesn't sleep longer than 2-3 hours at 16 months....not what I had planned.

Buying a house and then promptly "loosing" $100,000...not what I had planned.

Living in aforementioned home for 20+ years...not what I had planned.

Being a middle school teacher...not what I had planned.

Being a full-time working mom...not what I had planned.

Not working out in what feels like forever...not what I had planned.

Being behind in my Bible-in-a-year again...not what I had planned.

All my close girlfriends moving out of state or country...not what I had planned.

But you know what? I'm SO happy and content despite things being NOT what I had planned. Because I see God's fingerprints all over my life, I know things are going JUST RIGHT. Just as HE has planned.

As of yesterday we have been married EIGHT years! Wohoo! And even though this house is not our dream of a little bit of land...it's a great home in a great location and I get to share it with a great husband and the world's cutest most awesome son. And he's so cute and smells so great, I don't really mind the frequent wake-ups, snuggles and cuddles. I've grown used to his smell and warm milky breath cuddled up next to me in bed. When he does finally sleep through the night I think I'm going to miss him so much it hurts.

Also since yesterday, my kids will officially be more than 2 years apart. Another month and no baby #2. It makes me sad. Even though I trust God and HIS plans, I really wanted my boys (because that's what I want) to be close in age and best friends and to play sports together. My sadness doesn't mean I don't trust God...it's just one more not what I had planned. 


But I know that someday I'll look back and be so grateful for how things turned out and I'll see even more of God's fingerprints in the timing...of kids and houses and jobs and everything else. God is good ALL the time. ALL the time, GOD IS GOOD.

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